I wasn't who you wanted me to be, was I? You had high hopes for me, for what you thought I could be, yet when I found my contentment down the road I was meant to travel, you were disappointed. So you dropped me.
But not in the merciful way of reaction and anger (which would give me reason to discredit you), nor either in the way that is easy to brush off - sadness and withdrawal. No, instead you chose the more painful way. You chose to find someone else right in front of me, and dote on this newfound protegee, and just let me watch.
I know that I'm not meant to be what you'd like me to be. I thought for a time that was my calling, but I was fooling myself. I'll probably never know exactly what you think of my choices, and I won't be the one to ruin the gossamer relationship we still have. I feel as though I might bring harsh feelings to the forefront if I begin the paramount conversation of what exactly you think of me now.
But in the end, I just wish I could still be accepted by you. In the end, I want to be the student that achieved mastery, and who made the master proud. And short of that, I wish I could've been the student that chose a different path, yet could still be accepted, still be loved.
But perhaps it is not in the nature of masters to accept.
